By Daniel Bobinski
Over the past four decades, I’ve observed a serious problem in the workplace. Actually, I think it’s a disease, but those who have it rarely know they have it. I call this disease Adult Syndrome, because it affects so many adults. Like other diseases, Adult Syndrome has several variants: Type I and Type II. However, each type leads to the same result: decreased levels of productivity.
After reviewing some of the symptoms listed here, you may find that you are infected. In fact, you may be infected with both types. If you find this to be the case, you may need to spend extra time addressing the cure.
TYPE I Adult Syndrome: Imagined Understanding
This form of the disease is carried by those who imagine that because they are adults, they should already understand what someone is saying before they say it. One indicator that someone has this variant of the disease is they frequently use the phrase “I know.”
Interestingly, this variant of the disease affects people trying to hide the fact that they don’t know something, mainly because they’re afraid they’ll appear inferior for not being omniscient.
Warning: Type I Adult Syndrome can be acute in people holding supervisory positions.
Case Study #1: A budding manager is sitting in a class learning how to calculate financial returns for a capital investment. Although he doesn’t fully understand the process, he acts like he does and doesn’t say a word when the instructor asks, “Any questions?”
Case Study #2: A production manager hears that there are problems happening in production, but doesn’t ask anyone about the details. Based on his years of working in the plant, he believes he already knows what’s causing the problem. The manager sends out a memo that outlines mandatory changes to how things are to be done from that point forward, but his solutions don’t fix the problem.
Case Study #3: A senior employee is reassigned to a new position about which he has little knowledge. He makes light of the training he receives and, accordingly, his productivity never reaches acceptable levels. His supervisor calls him in to review the job requirements, then asks if the employee understands what’s required. Being a senior employee who doesn’t want to appear inept, the employee says, “Yes.”
TYPE II Adult Syndrome: Intentional Deflection
This variant of the disease is rooted in self-preservation. It fools observers by redirecting attention when the infected person doesn’t know – or doesn’t want to know – the answer.
Case Study #1: When asked to evaluate what went wrong with a certain project, a project manager strives to maintain his reputation. He goes through the motions, then pins the blame on a junior employee. In this case, the infected manager is concerned that others might see a flaw in his quality control methods, and he doesn’t want to look inept to his peers.
Case Study #2: In a training class discussion on how to solve a particular problem, a person makes a recommendation that would never solve the problem being discussed. When the instructor begins to discuss alternative approaches, the person continually interrupts with “yeah, but…” and keeps implying that his solution should be acknowledged as being OK.
Case Study #3: A worker with a problem comes to a manager, but the manager has no clue about how to solve it. Not wanting the worker to know this, the manager interrupts, saying if the worker can’t solve this simple problem, he can be replaced by someone who can.
In all these cases, the infected people want to be seen as someone who has what it takes, but Adult Syndrome causes them to miss out on key opportunities.
Curing Adult Syndrome is possible, but the treatment can be a tough pill to swallow. The best antidote is a large, thick slice of humble pie. I’m not talking about groveling. Humble pie is simply a dose of reality taken with some introspection. Sadly, too many people deny humility’s healing powers, viewing it as a weakness rather than a strength.
Those who hold such views would benefit from listening to business consultant and marketing expert Ira Williams, who says, “To be humble is not to be weak – to be humble is to be strong.” These are fresh words with a powerful, age-old meaning. Sadly, they are glossed over by too many adults in today’s business world.
Additional treatment for Adult Syndrome includes increasing one’s ability to exercise patience. Another part of treatment involves genuinely considering another person’s point of view. In his book “Why Don’t You Want What I Want? How to Win Support for Your Ideas without Hard Sell, Manipulation, or Power Plays,” author Rick Maurer says we need to be willing to be changed by listening to another person.
I should point out that Maurer’s advice doesn’t mean we should desire to be changed, but rather that we are willing. Misunderstanding this difference is why many continue to suffer from Adult Syndrome.
Essentially, if we are willing to listen to someone else and realize we are not omniscient, the symptoms of Adult Syndrome begin to fade away. When that happens, working relationships become healthy, and productivity goes up.
Bottom line: You can help eradicate Adult Syndrome in your workplace. Just listen to others with a willingness to learn and, if necessary, be changed. As Ira Williams says, it’s not a sign of weakness, but a position of strength.
In addition to blogging about emotional intelligence at eqfactor.net, Daniel Bobinski, M.Ed. runs two businesses. One helps teams and individuals learn how to use Emotional Intelligence. The other helps companies improve their training programs. He’s also a best-selling author and a popular speaker at conferences and retreats. Reach him at daniel@eqfactor.net or 208-375-7606.
