By Manny Roman, CRES
The MD Expo is coming to Vegas! The MD Expo (mdexposhow.com) will be held next month April 7-9, just 40 minutes from where we live so we are happy about that. We are also happy that I am invited to conduct a presentation at the MD Expo on Sunday, April 7 at 11:30 a.m. They know that I sleep until 10 so they gave me wakeup time.
My presentation is titled “What Your Body is Actually Saying.” We will explore the process of complete communication, which includes a good grasp of the nonverbal cues: The language of the body.
When people enter into the process of communication, it truly is a negotiation for the understanding of the message which is being discussed. We use words, tone and inflection and nonverbal cues to encode and convey the message. The person receiving the encoded message is tasked with deciphering and decoding the message. I will discuss the filtration systems and the internal and external barriers in my presentation.
Some research indicates that 7% of a message is carried by the words, 38% is carried by the intonations of the spoken words, and 55% is carried by the body language. You would think that it is an advantage to not only know this but to also be proficient at reading the body language since it carries most of the message. It can be an advantage and also a problem.
The nonverbal cues to the real meaning of a communication are hugely important to the message. Unless someone is uncomfortable with what they are saying, the words, intonations and nonverbal cues all match nicely. The message is sent, received, decoded and understood fairly well.
When discomfort enters the picture, the sender of the message finds it hard to control what their body is saying. Subtle discrepancies between the verbal and nonverbal messages pop into plain view to the observant receiver of the message. We will discuss many of these discomfort signs, and their meaning, in my presentation.
What do you do when you see these signs that the person is uncomfortable with what the words are saying? Do you confront? Yes, but only if you care about the individual, the situation or the outcome. How do you confront? Gently, by asking for clarification and consensus on the message. This begins the negotiation for the true message.
I should point out here that when you see something in someone’s body language, you should probe to be sure you are correct before taking action on it. It is the action that normally gets us in trouble, not the conclusion we reach.
What about the “practiced deceivers” who are pretty good at controlling their nonverbal cues? These are a great problem to me. You see, I know they are lying because their lips are moving, but I can’t detect any other sign.
I hope you will join me in my presentation of the full communication process including the nonverbal, body language cues.
The good folks at MD Publishing asked that I provide a good picture of me for the MD Expo marketing. My lovely wife Ruth told them to use the same picture they use for this column because: “I don’t look like I look now, I look like I looked then.” Whuuaaaaat?
How about that for 7% communication!
Manny Roman, CRES, is association business operations manager at Association of Medical Service Providers.
